Chapter 4: Ancient Pasts

At the Time Gates, inside a lonely dark castle:

[ Setsuna is floating in the middle of the room, levitating herself and meditating. She awakens when a package from the mail appeared in front of her. Setsuna opened up the package to see a new yaoi movie of Vega X Dan, the one that she has been waiting months for. She uses magic to make a large TV screen appear in front of her to watch the new yaoi movie. The images were blurry at first but after a few minutes the pictures became really clear. What showed up on TV were scenes from Ancient Prehistoric times. It was a caveman wearing a pink gi chasing after another caveman with long blond hair.]

Caveman Dan: Me Dan love you Vega!

Caveman Vega: NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!

[Click. The scene changed to the Renaissance times. There was a Renaissance version of Dan rowing a boat on a romantic Italian river as he sings to a Renaissance Vega.]

Renaissance Dan: When the moon hits the sky like a big pizza pie, that's amorez! Vega, your lips are as delicious as a big plate of spaghetti! I paint a beautiful picture of you and I, no?

Renaissance Vega: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!

[Click. This time it was during Ancient Greek where philosophers were discussing the meaning of the word Saikyo.]

Philosopher Dan: To drill Vega or not to drill Vega? That is the question.

Philosopher Vega: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!

[Click. It was now Dan and Vega in Old England. Vega and Dan were wearing big white wigs and large uncomfortable dresses.]

English Dan: I say, my good man, it's a jolly good day for tea and Vega.

English Vega: Bloody NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!

[Click. Welcome to Ancient China during the Pink Dynasty where Emperor Dan is hugging his Vega dressed in silk robes.]

Emperor Dan: My kingdom for a Vega. Dan ready to use herbal lotions to give Vega's ass good Saikyo massage.

Emperor Vega: NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!

[Click. Present day Dan and Vega. Dan was chasing Vega in a Mc. Donalds fast food restaurant.]

Dan: Vega, my love, Dan is hungry for a Vega Mc. Yummy! Let's enjoy a kissy wissy over a sundae with pink sprinkles.

Vega: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!

[As Setsuna finished watching the movie she suddenly realized something.]

Setsuna: Perhaps everyone is right about me. My life really is lonely and pathetic. I really should go out there to find a nice man to marry but to Hell with it.

[Setsuna goes back to her meditations.]